Brian Carter's maternal grandfather was a little old man, not very tall, but very tough. He worked at the electron tube factory over in Dashanzi, just an ordinary fitter, not highly educated—at most, he could read the newspaper and such. So where did this toughness show? First of all, in his physical toughness: every morning at 4 a.m., he would get up, go to Ditan Park to practice tai chi, then pick a big tree and bump every part of his body against it, and then walk all the way east, passing through Dongzhimen straight to the Jiuxianqiao Dashanzi area.

How far is that? It's about the same as walking from Ditan Park to Wangjing Community, roughly 9 kilometers one way. On the way, he'd stop at a breakfast shop in Dongzhimen for some baozi and stewed liver, have the lunch he brought in his lunchbox at noon, and after work, walk all the way back home, picking up some snacks for the kids at home along the way. The kids here refer to Brian Carter and Brian Carter's little uncle. As for the aunt who was only 12 years older than Brian Carter, in his grandfather's eyes, she didn't count as a child at all, let alone deserve snacks—only the boys in the family were considered children; girls were just raised for other families, as long as they were kept alive, that was enough! Even one extra bite was a serious waste!

If it was just not buying snacks, that would be tolerable, but that was only a small detail. In Brian Carter's grandmother's house, the time when grandfather came home from work was the time for dinner. The old man would arrive home at almost exactly the same time every day, so as soon as he entered, after a couple sips of hot tea, the food and drinks had to be on the table—being even a minute late was unacceptable. If it was late, grandmother would get complaints, the aunt who helped cook would get scolded, and if Brian Carter's mother was home, all three women would get a talking-to. If Brian Carter's eldest aunt and uncle were also there, then all four women would get scolded together!

But this scolding, complaining, or yelling was only directed at the women in the family. People like Brian Carter's father, eldest uncle, eldest uncle-in-law, little uncle, and even Brian Carter himself would never get scolded. The old man truly believed from the bottom of his heart that the men in the family were the ones who worked and earned money, while the women were supposed to wash, clean, cook, and look after the children. If he didn't do well at work or didn't bring home his salary, that was his problem; aside from that, every other problem was the women's problem and they had to be taught!

The old man didn't smoke, but at every meal he had to drink two small cups of baijiu. The little porcelain cups, called "eight-coin cups" in Beijing, held less than two taels of liquor each. The order of eating at grandmother's house was like this: first came the drinks and appetizers, usually just some shredded radish or cabbage hearts. If the old man was in a good mood, he might bring back a bit of pig's head meat or lamb offal from his way home, wrapped in yellow oil paper and stuffed in his pocket. At mealtime, he'd take it out and put it on the table, and the aroma would fill the whole courtyard.

Once the drinks were almost finished, the main and hot dishes would be served—usually cabbage stewed with potatoes, radish stewed with potatoes, stir-fried cucumber, braised string beans, and at most a small plate of eggs. Most Beijing families were like this at the time: in winter, it was cabbage, radish, and potatoes; in summer, swap out the cabbage for cucumber and string beans. It was like this all year round, with dumplings or baozi made a few times a month, or maybe some zhajiang noodles with a bit of minced meat.

There had to be an order to serving the dishes, and the people eating had to line up in order too. Only the men in the family could eat at the same table as grandfather. The son-in-law sat first, because according to old Beijing customs, the son-in-law was considered a guest and deserved respect—usually only Brian Carter's father, since his eldest uncle-in-law lived far away and wouldn't come except for holidays. The little boys sat second, meaning Brian Carter and his little uncle. The remaining grown boys sat last, but if any of them could drink with the old man, their seat could move up. Unfortunately, including Brian Carter's father, no one in the family except the old man drank alcohol.

After the men finished eating—usually after grandfather finished, wiped his mouth, and left the table—the women in the family could finally sit down to eat. By then, all the good dishes and the little bit of meat on the table had already been eaten up by Brian Carter and his little uncle. When Brian Carter was a child, he didn't think there was anything wrong with this custom; it never even crossed his mind. Only when he grew up and got married did he realize how spiritually "wealthy" his grandfather had been. Starting from his generation, the status of Beijing men declined sharply—anyone who dared treat his wife like that could expect a divorce.

After following his eldest uncle back to grandmother's house, grandfather hadn't come home from work yet. Only grandmother and aunt were in the house making dumplings. Once his eldest uncle brought Brian Carter into the courtyard, his job was done, and he went to wash his hands and help grandmother. In grandmother's house, except for grandfather, grandmother, and little uncle, no one liked Brian Carter, because he was too mischievous. As the old Beijing saying goes, he was "mischievous beyond the norm."

He could hold a grudge just because his aunt wouldn't let him pull her pigtails, then dig a little trap at the courtyard gate, fill it with mud mixed with water, and wait for his aunt to come home from school so he could get her shoes dirty. But his aunt didn't fall in—the neighbor, Grandpa Tai, did. He could also, just because the little girl in the alley wouldn't play with him, kick her beanbag onto the roof, or break her jump rope. In any case, there wasn't a day he didn't get into trouble outside; almost every day, some parent would bring their child to his house to complain.