Life too stressful? Then become a foolish emperor!

　　Getting dirty looks while job hunting? Then become a foolish emperor!

　　Boss exploiting you? Then become a foolish emperor!

　　Housing prices too high to afford? Then become a foolish emperor!

　　No money to date a girlfriend? Then become a foolish emperor!

　　Stocks plummeting nonstop? Then become a foolish emperor!

　　Wife won’t let you smoke? Then become a foolish emperor!

　　Our motto is: If you’re going to be an emperor, be the most willful, do-as-you-please, all-time number one foolish emperor.

Chapter 1 Foolish Emperor

　　……

　　“Foolish emperor!” a delicate voice scolded.

　　William Carter groggily, faintly woke up. In his mind, it was as if this sentence lingered—a gentle, clear, yet obviously sorrowful and indignant rebuke that wouldn’t fade for a long time.

　　What a beautiful voice. William Carter shook his somewhat dizzy head and opened his eyes. What entered his sight was a graceful, elegant woman in luxurious ancient attire, standing prettily less than two meters away. Her skin was fair and delicate like cream, her eyes bright, her teeth white, stunningly beautiful and beyond compare. Only, her brows were too upright, lacking some softness, instead carrying a bit more heroism and noble dignity.

　　Strangely, her expression at this moment was filled with inexplicable grief and anger, her starry eyes glaring with a sense of resolve straight at William Carter. Her expression looked odd—somewhat pained, sorrowful, even trembling. Her slender, pink neck was slightly raised, as if resisting something. That pretty yet pitiful look made one want to hold her in their arms and protect her. Somewhat embarrassingly, William Carter’s heart began to race. Having lived for over twenty years, he had never seen such a radiant, dignified, and nobly elegant girl who made him feel inferior.

　　“No, no, I need to get my thoughts straight. How did I fall asleep, and why do I see this woman in ancient dress when I wake up? Clearly, with my experience, I’ve never even seen such a noble, beautiful woman on TV, let alone have any connection with one. Is this a TV station prank? Or…” William Carter rubbed his head, thinking carefully, recalling, as bits and pieces of the past floated through his mind.

　　“That’s right, my name is William Carter… graduated from a third-rate university. Like most people my age, I basically coasted through those four years. Yet I was still arrogant, so even after two years since graduation, I’ve changed jobs four or five times. My salary went to food and drink and rent, not only did I not save a penny, I even spent all the five thousand yuan my family gave me for living expenses. I haven’t worked for two months, spending day and night at home playing pirated games, watching pirated movies, reading pirated novels, and watching pirated AV. Or I’d join the Sora Aoi forum and chat all day with like-minded netizens.”

　　As for recent memories, things were a bit hazy. He vaguely remembered it was raining heavily outside, and the well-dressed beast of a man next door had somehow lured in another lost little lamb. The moans of that shameless couple kept coming through the partition into his ears. Heaven knows, though he’d dated a girl in college, at most they’d held hands, and broke up soon after graduation. Aside from his right hand, he was now a bona fide virgin.

　　William Carter was so irritated by those constant, alternating moans that he had only one thought at the time: why couldn’t the heavens send a bolt of lightning to strike dead that beast next door, who was just as broke as he was? That way, innocent girls and young wives wouldn’t be deceived by his refined, handsome appearance, only to end up losing both money and body.

　　Boom! A deafening thunderclap exploded in William Carter’s hazy memory, and he only remembered a lightning bolt as thick as a bucket smashing through the window. In a daze, he seemed to hear a majestic, booming voice complain, “Damn, missed again!”

　　……

　　Thinking of that lightning, and how TV stars are all about packaging and reek of money, none could compare to the woman before him—so pure and moving, as if untouched by the dust of the mortal world. William Carter quickly came to a conclusion: he had transmigrated…

　　With this realization, William Carter didn’t panic, but actually felt rather calm. Four years of college, two years of work. He lacked many things, but not time or that thing people say you can sell for a bit of money. He’d read countless transmigration novels on Qidian, with all sorts of bizarre ways to cross over. Having seen so much, being struck by lightning and transmigrating didn’t seem so rare. Since it wasn’t rare, what was there to panic about?

　　But one thing was important: he had to figure out what he’d transmigrated into. These days, for the sake of novelty, people transmigrate into anything. Some end up as young ladies, or even lose their manhood. Even more outrageous, some become demons, monsters, fish, shrimp, sea beasts, snakes, or centipedes.