Are there seniors? True Lords? This seat? Hunting a great demon dog?

All sorts of specialized terms from xianxia novels.

The way people in the group chat talk is also quite amusing—half-archaic, half-modern. It feels like modern people trying to communicate in ancient language, but because their classical Chinese skills are lacking, the result is a very awkward way of speaking.

“Hiss~~” Ethan Brooks couldn’t help but laugh out loud.

Looks like this group was created by a xianxia enthusiast?

Oh no, this is definitely not just an ordinary xianxia fan group!

Everyone in the group has given themselves a Daoist title, their homes are called “caves,” and even the group owner’s lost pet dog is described as a great demon dog that ran away from home. Someone even claims they haven’t fought a Confucian cultivator in over a hundred years—in other words, that person is claiming to be several hundred years old?

Just reading these chat logs gives a strong sense of secondhand embarrassment.

“This level of obsession has already reached the stage of chuunibyou, and it’s a very Chinese xianxia-style chuunibyou at that.” Ethan Brooks nodded to himself.

Looks like this is a gathering place for xianxia chuunibyou patients!

That was his first impression of the “Nine Provinces Number One Group” and its members.

But why was he added to the group?

He checked the profile of the group owner, Henry Clark, who wasn’t his classmate, and he was sure he didn’t know him.

Was it added by mistake?

Chapter 2: Let This Honored One Cast a Divination

They say you haven’t truly been young if you’ve never had a chuunibyou phase.

Everyone goes through that stage to some extent—some show it openly, others keep it hidden inside. That’s the difference between overt and covert chuunibyou.

Ethan Brooks was a bit mature for his age, so that phase came and went quickly for him.

By the time he was in the second year of middle school, while the boys around him were still lost in dreams of martial arts heroes, superheroes, and immortals—waving their hands around pretending to use the Eighteen Dragon Subduing Palms or transform into Superman—Ethan had already given up hope on all that.

The laws of physics in this world are so precise. For a human to leap three stories high, clap their hands and unleash a golden dragon, or fly just by wearing their underwear on the outside—these things are simply impossible!

Still, he really liked xianxia novels and superhero movies. Maybe deep down, he still hoped that one day a superhero, an alien, or an immortal would appear before him.

He knew it was impossible, but for some reason, he still looked forward to it. Maybe that’s a uniquely human trait?

Ethan Brooks smiled and closed the group chat window, but he didn’t leave the group.

He felt the people in the Nine Provinces Number One Group were quite interesting. Those chat logs that made him feel embarrassed just reading them were, from a bystander’s perspective, unexpectedly entertaining—so before the group owner kicked him out, he planned to lurk for a while, read all sorts of amusing chat records, and kill some time when he was bored.

On the computer screen, the movie was still playing. It seemed to be a horror film. All sorts of terrifying scenes kept coming up—this movie was the masterpiece of a genius horror director, and it was said that many grown men had been scared to tears by it, with lots of people saying they were too scared to go to the bathroom alone afterward.

Unfortunately, Ethan Brooks still didn’t feel scared at all. After rewinding and watching for a bit, he yawned again, slowly shifted from sitting to lying down, and his eyelids grew heavier and heavier...

If that genius director knew his movie only had this much effect, he’d probably cry, right?

Half-asleep, Ethan Brooks had a wonderful dream.

It was an extremely pleasant dream, truly delightful. There were immortals, superheroes, and all kinds of fairylands.

Eternal life and freedom, moving mountains and seas, roaming the world with a sword—how many people throughout history have dreamed of this? But as people grow older, reality shatters dreams, and they can only hide those dreams deep in their hearts, no longer daring to think about them.

A dream is, after all, just a dream...

……

The next day, May 21st, Tuesday, 1:00 a.m.

In the group chat, the group owner Henry Clark finally came online.

As soon as he appeared, Logan Carter popped up and asked, “True Lord, who was that ‘Shushan Pressure’ you added yesterday? Where do they cultivate?”

“The person I added yesterday? Didn’t you guys talk to her? She’s the daughter of an old friend of mine born in this era. Seems to have good talent—so young and already at the peak of third-rank acquired stage, about to step into fourth-rank innate. Quite impressive.” Henry Clark laughed and replied.

Born in this era, so she’s probably under forty? Already at the peak of third-rank acquired at that age—definitely a genius. Logan Carter nodded to himself, but the Daoist title still seemed odd. “Shushan Pressure” just doesn’t sound like a Daoist name.

While Logan Carter was still thinking, Henry Clark suddenly said, “Huh? My old friend’s daughter’s Daoist title isn’t ‘Shushan Pressure.’ By the way, what the heck is this ‘Shushan Pressure’?”

“……” Henry Clark was speechless.

It’s not some random thing, True Lord, it’s the unknown human you added yesterday.

He tentatively asked, “True Lord, did you add the wrong person?”

“Let this honored one check.”

A moment later.

Henry Clark sent a string of cold sweat emojis in the group: “I really did add the wrong person. The number was only off by one digit in the middle—I typed 9 instead of 8. I can’t believe I made such a big mistake.”